第1章
1990, at the selection site for test pilots in an aviation academy.
"Astrella Brooks?"
"Present!"
"Are you willing to voluntarily participate in the supersonic test flight mission? The mission duration is indefinite, the location classified and once you commit, contact with the outside world will be prohibited except under special circumstances. Please confirm!"
"I confirm!" Astrella declared, her voice unwavering. "I am willing to join the test flight mission to protect the skies of our motherland!"
"Test flight missions are inherently perilous. Are you prepared to sacrifice your life if the mission demands it?"
Astrella’s faint smile carried quiet determination. "I’ve long since accepted the risks of life and death. Without the sacrifices of test pilots, the advancement of aviation would never take flight."
Test pilots were known as "the profession closest to death in peacetime."
One tiny misstep could mean a fatal end.
Hearing her response, the chief examiner gave a curt nod, handing her a sealed document. "Open this only after you return home," he instructed. "If, after reading the contents, your resolve remains steadfast, call the number inside. Our team will arrange to pick you up at the designated time and place."
He hesitated before adding, "According to our records, Comrade Brooks, you have a young son and—"
Before he could finish, Astrella cut him off with unwavering resolve. "I won’t hesitate! Yes, I have a child, but I am not officially married to his father. We’ve been separated for some time now. My family situation will not interfere with my decision."
After speaking, she gave a deep, respectful bow. Straightening her back, she strode out of the interview room with a resolve that left no room for doubt.
Her marriage had long turned into a stagnant pool, a lifeless bond without a solidifying certificate. They had been living apart for years and yet, at just twenty-six, in the prime of her youth, no one truly understood her.
When their marriage was supposed to be formalized, she had dutifully reported the paperwork to her unit. But Raiden received a phone call and, without a word, left in a hurry.
She waited in vain, lingering at the entrance of the civil affairs bureau from dawn until dusk. Even when the doors closed, Raiden never appeared.
When she returned home, she was startled to find relatives and friends gathered to celebrate their supposed "wedding."
Raiden Lancaster, however, remained silent, offering no explanation.
Astrella hadn’t cared much at the time. Her decision to marry him hadn’t been born out of love but out of a sense of duty to care for the only son of her late mentor.
She had been so young back then, sharing a turbulent wind tunnel experiment with her mentor aboard the same plane.
At that time, they braved relentless aftershocks, pushing through countless obstacles to complete the mission.
There were moments when Astrella felt death’s icy grip brushing against her. Still, her mentor’s unmatched experience and calm wisdom always pulled them back from the abyss.
When the plane finally landed, she erupted in jubilant cheers. But as she turned to share the moment with him, she froze. Her mentor had stopped breathing.
His eyes remained locked on the horizon, refusing to close as though he were still chasing the dream that carried them both.
Fighting back her grief, Astrella discovered a will clutched in his arms.
It was short, just a few lines, but every word was steeped in the aching sorrow of a father’s love.
“After more than twenty years as a test pilot, I’ve flown missions when my wife passed away and missions when my child graduated. I’ve fulfilled my duty to the skies and the land but failed the ones I hold dear.”
“If I may, I ask the organization to help cover my son’s tuition for the next semester. His name is Raiden and he is a PhD candidate in finance at Arindale University.”
Her thoughts wandered to Raiden.
Back then, she had been captivated by how melodic his name sounded.
The first time she laid eyes on him, Raiden stood at the lecture podium. A vibrant young professor radiating confidence and charisma, his words flowed like a river, mesmerizing everyone in the room.
In that instant, she decided she would give him the family he deserved.
What followed seemed like a dream woven to perfection. They married, had a child and built a life together.
Until the sixth year of their marriage, when Norella Everest returns like a ghost from the past.
第2章
She had been Raiden’s childhood friend. Once upon a time, they had made plans to go abroad together, but fate had other intentions. When Raiden’s mother fell gravely ill, he stayed behind while Norella, with tears streaming down her face, boarded the plane alone.
Six years later, she returned to the country and moved into the house next door.
From the moment Norella came back, Raiden seemed drawn to her orbit. He applied for school projects that partnered him with her and their meetings became a frequent occurrence. Even their son, full of excitement, often dashed out to play with her.
“This is a frisbee! Aunt Norella gave it to me. It’s so much cooler than the dragonfly toy Mom gave me!”
Raiden said nothing to the child’s remark, his lips curving into a faint smile as he ruffled his son’s hair. But his gaze shifted to the table, scanning the untouched dishes and his expression hardened.
“You didn’t cook?”
On the table sat a modest spread, tomato scrambled eggs, braised ribs and crystal shrimp. She had carried them back from the school cafeteria, untouched, waiting for her family to return.
“I went out today…”
Before she could finish, Reaghan tugged at his father’s hand, throwing a meaningful glance toward the door.
Raiden picked up on the cue effortlessly. “Reaghan doesn’t like these dishes,” he remarked, his tone casual.
“Exactly! Dad knows me best! Let’s go grab KFC!”
Watching the effortless coordination between father and son, Astrella chose not to expose them. Her sharp gaze had already caught the faint silhouette of Norella lingering just outside the door. Lowering her eyes, she let a bitter smile tug at her lips.
Their hearts had drifted far from home.
As she stood there, the sound of their laughter echoed in the hallway as the three walked away together. She turned to face the table brimming with untouched food, her chest heavy with a quiet sigh.
This was meant to be a family reunion dinner.
But life rarely unfolds as one hopes. Perhaps their fragile ties as a family had finally unraveled.
After finishing her meal in silence, she pulled out the envelope.
The envelope was sealed with a wax stamp, a symbol of finality. Inside, there were a few papers: a will, a life-and-death agreement and a titanium tag etched with a string of numbers.
With steady hands, she signed her name before dialing the number scrawled on the paper.
After hanging up, she took a slow, deliberate look around the house. A pang of reluctance gripped her chest.
This house had been her home for six years.
What had begun as a marriage of gratitude had, over time, blossomed into something deeper, something real. The bond she had built here made the thought of leaving sting more than she had ever anticipated.
But she pushed the feeling aside. It was best to part on good terms, especially now that her decision was made.
In the stillness of the night, she awoke parched and went to pour a glass of water. As she passed the living room, she noticed the bathroom light was still on and instinctively turned it off.
The sudden, sharp scream of a woman shattered the silence, leaving her frozen in place.
Moments later, the sharp click of the living room light echoed through the silence. Raiden stepped in, his eyes narrowing as they landed on her.
“What are you doing out here?”
Perhaps realizing the harshness of his tone, he softened it, though not by much. “The child is already asleep. What if you woke him?”
Before she could respond, the bathroom door creaked open.
Out stepped Norella, clad in a white bathrobe, her hair still damp, her face flushed from the warmth of the shower.
Without a second thought, Raiden grabbed a coat from the sofa and draped it over her shoulders.
“Norella’s power went out. I brought her over. You don’t mind, do you?”
Astrella felt the weight of his words, cold and dismissive. He wasn’t asking for permission; he was claiming his ground and asserting himself as the one in control.
He didn’t need her approval. He never had.
Their son, Reaghan, emerged from his room and the Ultraman toy was clutched tightly in his chubby fingers. His small hands rubbed at his eyes with an air of impatience.
“Dad, Aunt Norella, what are you doing here? I’m still waiting for you to tell me a story.”
Without even sparing a glance at Astrella, he turned and shuffled back toward his room.
Through the narrow crack in the door, his voice floated back, whiny and demanding. “Hurry up!”
第3章
“Aunt Norella, hurry up! I’m waiting for you!” Reaghan called eagerly, his voice filled with impatience.
Raiden cleared his throat, his voice cracking slightly, a flicker of panic flashing across his eyes.
“Norella’s just telling a story to the child, so…”
He trailed off as though scrambling for the right words.
Astrella remained composed, lifting her glass of water with a calm grace. “Alright, you all go ahead. Don’t keep the child waiting.” She turned and walked to her room, her steps steady, as if none of it truly affected her.
As she pushed the door, she realized it wouldn’t budge. Glancing down, her gaze met the firm grip of a large hand holding the handle.
Caught off guard, she found herself locked in a stare with Raiden’s deep brown eyes. There was a fleeting flash of surprise and unease there, but it quickly vanished.
“Astrella, don’t misunderstand,” he said quietly, his voice low.
Taking a deliberate step back, Astrella shook her head with calm detachment.
“Misunderstand what?”
The question made Raiden’s lips twitch, a visible struggle passing over his face. He remained silent, unable to offer a reply.
Beside them, Norella looked uncomfortable, shifting on her feet. “I’m sorry for disturbing you both. I’ll leave now.”
But before she could turn, both Astrella and Raiden spoke in unison, “You can’t leave!”
Raiden seemed even more surprised as he studied Astrella, his gaze probing and skeptical.
“You don’t have power at home. I can’t feel at ease,” he said, stepping past Astrella and taking Norella’s hand in his.
“Go keep the child company. I’ll sleep on the couch,” he added gently, his tone warm.
The ease between them was undeniable, striking in its familiarity.
Norella glanced up at Raiden, her fingers fiddling with the jacket draped over her shoulders. She pulled it slightly aside to reveal a sliver of pale skin.
“But… I’m just an outsider. I should be the one sleeping on the couch…”
Outsider? Wearing her husband’s jacket and telling stories to their child, how could she call herself an outsider? Norella’s words were a thinly veiled attempt to provoke.
Astrella felt a sharp pang of bitterness in her chest, but she quickly pushed it aside. What did it matter now? Her marriage to Raiden had always been out of gratitude and with her departure on the horizon, there was no room for such thoughts.
A faint smile tugged at her lips as she brushed past Raiden and opened the door. She stepped inside, locking it behind her.
What she didn’t know was that as the door clicked shut, Raiden’s breath quickened, his body tensing with something unspoken.
That night, sleep claimed her easily, peacefully and undisturbed.
The next morning, she awoke, pulled the earplugs from her ears and slipped into her workout clothes. She needed to keep her body in top shape if she was going to pass the test to become a pilot.
Aside from the six months she’d spent on maternity leave, she’d never let her fitness slide, often using the university track for her early morning runs.
At Arindale University, morning runs were a rite of passage for students and many of them recognized her immediately.
"Good morning, Miss Brooks!"
"Morning, Miss Brooks!"
Though she wasn’t a teacher, the students still greeted her with the same respect, mainly due to her connection with Raiden.
After covering a thousand meters, she wiped the sweat from her brow and made her way to the university cafeteria.
"Miss Brooks, grabbing breakfast for Mr. Lancaster again? The usual three?"
Raiden had a fondness for pancakes with maple syrup, while Reaghan preferred blueberry muffins and scrambled eggs. That had become their "usual three."
The tomato soup, a comforting blend of ripe tomatoes, fresh basil and a touch of cream, was simmered to perfection and served with a side of crusty bread.
On a winter morning, a steaming bowl of it was both soothing and filling.
Once she finished her breakfast, she glanced at the clock. It wasn’t even 8 a.m. yet. She decided to change and head to the library.
Living on campus made everything easier—reading, eating and everything in between. She appreciated the convenience Raiden’s arrangements had brought her.
But when she returned home, she found Raiden and Reaghan, one tall and one small, blocking the doorway.
From behind, she heard Raiden’s cold voice.
"Where did you go?"
"The cafeteria," Astrella replied with calm composure. She slipped off her shoes and coat, still feeling the chill from the outside air.
第4章
Raiden froze for a moment, his gaze dropping to her empty hands. His brows furrowed, a storm of frustration brewing.
Reaghan pouted, his small voice filled with complaint. “Mom, why didn’t you get my favorite chocolate chip cookies? And Dad’s pancakes?”
Astrella blinked in surprise. “I thought you two had already eaten.”
Ever since Norella had moved next door, making sandwiches for Reaghan, he’d developed a taste for them. They quickly replaced his old favorites, like bagels with cream cheese and hard-boiled eggs, which now lay forgotten in the trash.
“I don’t want those! I want ‘white people food.’ Auntie Norella says sandwiches are the healthiest breakfast!”
Reaghan clung to Raiden’s sleeve, his expression a picture of misery. “I hate Mom the most. Dad, take me to find Aunt Norella.”
Raiden’s lips quirked in a faint, understanding smile as he gently patted the boy’s head. “Alright, Daddy will take you to Aunt Norella.”
As he carried the child past Astrella, a flicker of dissatisfaction clouded his gaze. “From now on, don’t worry about me or the child.”
Astrella froze for a heartbeat but then nodded with quiet composure. “Alright.”
Raiden’s jaw tightened and with a harsh slam, he shut the door behind him.
She changed her clothes, grabbed her bag and headed to the library. When she returned that evening, the familiar sight of the pair on the couch, lost in a cartoon, greeted her. The air was thick with the mouthwatering aroma of food drifting from the kitchen.
Reaghan glanced at her nervously, aware that his mother rarely allowed him to indulge in TV. He shifted closer to his father, stealing a quick look at Astrella before turning his attention back to the screen.
Raiden, on the other hand, seemed oblivious to her presence, engrossed in the show, as though he hadn’t noticed the woman who truly held dominion over the household.
“You’re back, Astrella,” Norella called from the kitchen, carrying a platter of dishes. The fragrance of four carefully prepared dishes and a steaming soup filled the room, a comfort for the senses. “Raiden, Reaghan, wash your hands and come eat.”
After dinner, Astrella wiped her mouth with a quiet grace before heading back to her room. She sat at her desk, opened her laptop and began reviewing the day’s lessons.
Not long after, a knock on the door echoed through the stillness. Raiden entered, his expression as serious as always. “Astrella, who are you showing that sour attitude to?”
Astrella lifted her gaze, her almond-shaped eyes sparkling as they locked with his.
Caught off guard, Raiden’s gaze flickered for a moment and he quickly turned his head, avoiding her stare. “You ate the meal Norella made. Shouldn’t you be the one washing the dishes?”
For years, Astrella had done all the housework, sweeping, mopping, laundry, cooking, even fixing doors and unclogging drains. Every time she asked him to do something as simple as washing a dish, he would flatly refuse, claiming it was a woman’s responsibility.
But with Norella, it seemed the rules changed.
Astrella tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear, her lips curving into a faint smile. “Sorry, I’ve been busy lately. Don’t fuss over such trivial matters.”
Raiden frowned, his brow furrowing in confusion. What could possibly keep a housewife so busy? His gaze dropped and his long fingers hovered over the laptop just as he was about to open it and see what she was working on.
Suddenly, a sharp scream pierced the air, followed by the unmistakable sound of something shattering.
Raiden sprang into action, rushing out the door with Astrella hot on his heels.
He moved quickly, his tall frame shielding Norella as he gazed down at her tear-streaked face, his heart clenching painfully in his chest.
“Your hand is injured. I’ll take you to the hospital.”
“Daddy, I want to come too!” Reaghan jumped off the couch, his eyes wide with concern as he looked at Norella. “Auntie, I’ll blow on it for you. Mommy says it won’t hurt if I blow on it.”
第5章
As her words left her lips, both Reaghan and Norella turned to her, surprise flickering in their eyes.
Reaghan quickly dropped Norella’s hand, his cheeks turning a shade of red. “No need for a hospital. A band-aid will do.”
Raiden’s gaze shifted to her, sharp and expectant, silently demanding the first aid kit.
Once, a look like that would have sent her scrambling, her hands already reaching for the kit before he could show a hint of impatience.
But now? It didn’t matter. She didn’t care anymore.
“The kit’s in the second drawer of the TV cabinet,” she said, unmoving, her voice steady.
Raiden’s jaw clenched and the flicker of irritation in his eyes didn’t go unnoticed.
Instead, Norella crouched down, her fingers swiftly finding the first aid kit. “Raiden, it’s right here, iodine and cotton swabs, too.”
Reaghan leaned in with a curious gaze and Norella’s eyes sparkled. “Reaghan, you’re growing up fast. Do you think you can help Auntie clean the wound?”
“Of course!”
With a serious nod, Reaghan carefully dabbed iodine on the wound, his little breath gently blowing on it as if it could ease the pain.
Norella’s lips curled into a proud smile. “Our Reaghan is something special. Raiden, he’s learned so much from you.” Her gaze lingered on Raiden, her eyes soft with warmth.
Raiden cleared his throat, a faint smile tugging at the corner of his mouth, his ears turning a subtle shade of red.
Reaghan puffed out his chest. “Of course! When I grow up, I’ll protect Dad and Aunt Norella.”
A surge of bitter emotion swirled in Astrella’s chest.
She couldn’t help but let out a hollow laugh, bitterly amused at herself.
The day after she gave birth, she started washing Reaghan’s diapers, which continued until he was three.
When Raiden had insisted their child shouldn't be subjected to rote learning, she had stayed home, carefully teaching him each lesson.
Years of meticulous effort, yet none of it had ever been acknowledged or appreciated.
To them, father and son alike, no matter how much she did, it was met with cold indifference.
She turned, heading back to her room and overheard Norella’s warm laughter behind her.
“Reaghan, Raiden, you two are wonderful; you’ve given me the warmth of a real family.”
Reaghan kissed Norella’s cheek.
“Aunt Norella, you’re better than my mom. Why don’t you stay and be my mom instead?”
Astrella pressed her lips together, her gaze steady and silent. She turned and entered her room, the laughter and words echoing in her ears.
She opened the bookshelf, tossing aside parenting books and children’s lesson plans, dumping them into a bamboo basket before dragging it outside.
Only Norella was in the living room; Raiden and Reaghan had gone to the kitchen to wash the dishes.
Engrossed in a TV shopping ad, Norella turned quickly at the sound of movement.
Her brows knitted in confusion. “What’s in the basket?”
Astrella’s lips curved into a faint smile. “Just some useless things. I’m thinking of selling them for scrap.”
Norella stood, lifting the lid and finding the basket brimming with early childhood education books. “Why are you throwing away books? That’s so uncultured! These are good books. How can you be a mother like this? No wonder Reaghan isn’t close to you.”
Astrella opened her mouth to respond, but her gaze shifted to Raiden emerging from the kitchen. She clamped her lips shut, swallowing her words instead.
Norella’s tone softened instantly, her gaze shifting to Raiden as her lips curved into a warm smile. “Raiden, look at these books Astrella is planning to throw away. What a waste! If we used these to educate Reaghan, maybe he’d turn out as impressive as you one day!”
Raiden glanced at the bamboo basket, wiping his hands slowly. “No need. We weren’t raised with books back then and didn’t we turn out fine? Don’t trouble yourself over it.”
At his words, Norella’s eyes suddenly welled with tears, her voice thick with emotion.
“Raiden, are you still upset about me leaving to study abroad? I never said goodbye, leaving you to bear the pain alone. It was my fault. I came back to make it right. Please, let me do more for you.”
第6章
Raiden was slightly startled. His gaze dipped and his lashes, dark as crow feathers, trembled ever so slightly.
It seemed like his mind wandered back to that year, the year his mother passed, his father abandoned them and the weight of tuition had been too heavy to bear, leaving him a shell of himself, drifting without purpose.
“Forget it. You had your reasons.” His voice softened as he gently wiped Norella’s tears away. “Given everything, I can understand.”
Astrella, however, felt an overwhelming sense of emptiness. She glanced at the clock on the wall, slipped on her coat and moved to leave.
“Where are you going now?”
Raiden frowned, his gaze sharp with confusion. This wasn’t like her.
In the past, she always told him where she was going. If he ever said he didn’t like it or didn’t want her to leave, she’d quietly listen and stay without question. But now, it felt like she had turned into someone else entirely.
Norella quickly wiped away her tears with the back of her hand, forcing a gentle smile. “Astrella, I know this talk of the past must be difficult for you. Why don’t we go out and clear our heads a little?”
Astrella made her way to the night market, a determined air about her. She spread an old bedsheet on the ground and boldly scrawled a sign. [2 dollars per item, nothing left behind!]
Raiden’s expression darkened as he watched her set up the makeshift stall. “Astrella, what are you doing? Are you trying to embarrass me? Do you think I can’t afford to take care of you?”
Before Astrella could respond, Norella tugged at Raiden’s arm, her voice calming, “Raiden, don’t be upset. Let’s walk over to the candied hawthorn stand instead.”
The mention of the sweet treat immediately caught Reaghan’s attention. He beamed and eagerly followed Norella, his mood shifting instantly.
Once the trio had walked away, Astrella set to work, pulling out the items she intended to sell. There were fountain pens, a few worn books, plush toys with frayed edges and some handmade trinkets she had crafted herself.
As Reaghan happily licked his candied hawthorn, he suddenly froze mid-bite. His gaze fixed on a child nearby, who was holding a bamboo dragonfly in their hand.
“Dad, that looks like mine,” he murmured, his voice filled with curiosity.
Raiden glanced down at the fountain pen in the father’s hand and a wave of recognition washed over him. The sleek, silver pen was too familiar to be a coincidence.
Raiden quickly pulled Reaghan back, making his way toward Astrella’s stall. A crowd had already begun to gather around it. He shoved his way through the onlookers, only to spot her handing over a small glass horse to a man in exchange for two dollars.
"You’re not selling that!"
"Why not? I paid for it. It's mine now," the burly man said, slipping the glass horse into his pocket with a smug smile, radiating arrogance.
Raiden’s frustration bubbled to the surface. "Because it’s mine!"
The man chuckled. "Yours? Will it answer to your call?"
Laughter rippled through the crowd at the remark and a few eyes turned to Raiden, making snide comments.
"Got a family, yet still spouting nonsense!"
Astrella remained silent, simply tucking the two dollars into her wallet, unbothered by their ridicule.
Raiden, his patience fraying, grabbed her hand, his voice tight with emotion.
"Astrella, have you lost your mind? Why are you suddenly selling our things?"
Our things?
Even Reaghan’s temper flared. "Mom, why’d you give away my bamboo dragonfly too?"
Astrella cast a brief glance at Reaghan, who was still happily munching on his candied hawthorn. Her voice was unshaken, but there was an edge to it.
"Didn’t you say you liked the frisbee Norella gave you more?"
Then, she shifted her gaze to Raiden, her tone hardening, her voice colder.
"And didn’t you say you didn’t want these things and I could give them away to anyone? What’s the problem now? I sold them and that’s suddenly wrong?"
Every item she’d sold today had been carefully chosen, gifts she’d poured love into for the father and son. Yet neither Raiden nor Reaghan had shown any care for them.
And now, when they were sold for barely anything to strangers, they suddenly seemed valuable?
Things that weren’t cherished were simply misplaced treasures.
Raiden’s silence seemed to scream frustration, but Norella’s voice cut through the tension, laced with guilt.
"Forget it, Raiden," she said, her voice filled with remorse. "Astrella’s clearly upset with me. This is my fault. I shouldn’t have gotten so close to you two."
第7章
Astrella’s words rippled through the crowd, sparking hushed whispers.
"A man caught between two women, what’s that about?"
"He seems so polished, but who knew he was such a charmer?"
Raiden’s face darkened at once, his jaw tightening as he grabbed Reaghan’s hand. Without sparing a glance, he stormed off, his steps heavy and fast.
Norella, on the edge of tears, hesitated for a moment before scrambling to follow him, her heels clicking nervously against the pavement. But the rush caught her off guard. She stumbled, losing her balance and falling hard.
Raiden turned in an instant, his instincts kicking in. He shot a quick, pointed glance at Astrella, then hurried to Norella’s side, lifting her effortlessly into his arms. With one last look at Astrella, he walked away, the tension between them as thick as ever.
As Raiden and Norella disappeared from view, Astrella calmly finished selling the last of her items. She paused for a moment, her gaze steady as the crowd began to disperse and then, with two boxes of steaming buns in hand, she made her way toward the residential compound for faculty families.
It was a place she’d visited often, a second home of sorts, where the retired professors lived quietly, relying on each other for support. Many had no families to care for them and the simplest tasks became increasingly difficult with age. Astrella had seen their struggles and stepped in without a second thought, bringing meals, doing laundry and helping with the day-to-day chores. One of them had even been the mentor of her late coach, a connection that had always stayed with her.
With her departure looming, she felt a deep urge to see if there was anything more she could do for them one last time.
To her surprise, as soon as Astrella stepped into the building, her eyes were drawn to the funeral wreaths that lined the entrance. A chill ran through her as she knocked on the door, waiting through a long silence before it finally creaked open.
When she learned that her late coach’s mentor had passed away as well, she could feel the weight of the news settle heavily on her chest. Her heart ached as tears welled up and without a second thought, she left every bit of money she had on her with the family before leaving, the grief too overwhelming to express in words.
Returning home, her steps felt heavy and the restlessness in her heart refused to settle. She switched on the desk lamp, its warm glow falling on the model airplane displayed on the table. She sat there for what felt like an eternity, her thoughts drifting.
Outside, the sounds of doors opening and closing, punctuated by the laughter and lively chatter of others, seemed so near, yet somehow distant from her own turmoil.
She picked up the borrowed English cassette from the library, flipped it open and started the familiar routine of listening, repeating the words over and over as if trying to drown out her thoughts.
As she prepared to go to bed, a knock echoed through the quiet room, followed by the unmistakable rattle of the door handle. She waited, heart in her throat, until her pager beeped, bringing her a message.
Raiden: [It’s me. Why are you locking the door now?]
It wasn’t like she’d just started locking it today.
They had been living apart for six months and for six months, Astrella had kept the door locked. Since he hadn’t made the first move to reach out, she had been more than content with the peace it brought her.
When she didn’t respond, another message chimed in. "Open the door!"
Raiden stood outside, the words stirring something in him that he couldn’t quite define. In his mind, Astrella had never been this cold toward him. He couldn’t remember when it had all shifted.
The Astrella he remembered had been like a small sun, always glowing with enthusiasm, chasing after him with eyes full of life. Her gaze had always sparkled when it landed on him, brimming with warmth and affection.
But now, something was different.
Just a few nights ago, when Norella had shown up at their door late, wearing nothing but a bathrobe, Astrella hadn’t even flinched. There was no surprise in her eyes, no reaction at all.
Even when their son became too attached to Norella, clinging to her like a lifeline, Astrella had simply stayed silent.
And now, today, she had done something unimaginable: selling the gifts she had once given them.
A heavy discomfort pressed against Raiden’s chest, like a thick block of cotton, suffocating him with its weight.
Astrella had turned into something cold, a lifeless stone. The warmth and light she once radiated toward him had disappeared, leaving only emptiness.
The thought of it made his heart tighten. As his hand rose to knock on the door, his phone rang, breaking his troubled thoughts.
"Raiden, the university needs you to go on a business trip to Maplewood. With the year winding down, considering your situation, you’re allowed to bring your wife and child. It’ll be a good chance to relax and all expenses will be covered."
Something stirred deep inside him.
Astrella was from Maplewood, yet after their marriage, she had never once returned. She’d been too busy caring for him.
Without thinking, Raiden found himself agreeing to the offer, the words slipping out of him as if they were the only solution.
After hanging up, a faint smile tugged at his lips, the first one in what felt like ages. Just as he opened his mouth to speak, soft, delicate hands snaked around his waist, pulling him gently back.
“To Maplewood? The snowy scenery at Pinecrest Lake is absolutely breathtaking. Can you take me with you?”
Before he could respond, Reaghan emerged from his room, clutching his Ultraman toy with excitement.
“Dad, take Aunt Norella and me to Maplewood! We don’t need Mom anymore!”
第8章
At that moment, the door swung open and Astrella stepped in, her eyes catching the scene. Reaghan, realizing his slip-up, quickly clamped his hand over his mouth and dashed back to his room, slamming the door behind him.
Caught off guard, Raiden quickly peeled the hands from his waist, a faint blush creeping onto his usually composed face.
Astrella, as if she hadn't seen a thing, smiled gently, the curve of her lips betraying nothing but calm.
Not long ago, her parents had visited and they had given their blessing for her to become a test pilot. There was no longer any need for her to return to Maplewood. Besides, with closed training starting soon, she wouldn't be able to join him on the business trip.
Seeing her reaction, Raiden swallowed nervously, his voice barely a whisper. "Astrella..."
Astrella cut him off, her voice calm and distant. “Since you’ve already made the arrangements, pack up and get ready to leave. I won’t be going. It’s just as well Mr. Emerson passed away and his family’s gone. I’ll see him off.”
With that, she closed the door, her figure disappearing behind it.
Perhaps it was her indifference that caused Raiden to refrain from seeking her out that evening.
The next night, after returning from wearing mourning black, Astrella found a note waiting for her on the table. [We went to the department store to buy some things. We’ll be back later.]
It was the first time Raiden had ever left her a note. The first time, he’d made the effort to inform her of his whereabouts.
After reading the note, Astrella placed it back on the table, took a hot shower, changed into fresh clothes and grabbed her backpack before heading out.
Despite it being a holiday, the library buzzed with students. Once she found an empty seat, she dove right into her work.
Two hours later, her pager beeped.
Raiden was asking her where she was.
“Library.”
“I didn’t know you were so passionate about studying.”
Not wanting to disturb the quiet, Astrella decided to borrow a few books to read at home. As she reached the library’s entrance, she spotted Raiden waiting for her.
“It’s late and it’s not safe. I’ll come pick you up from now on.”
Astrella opened her mouth to refuse but hesitated. After all, she’d only be coming here for a few more days.
Before she could speak, a shadow fell behind Raiden.
“Astrella, my dear sister, why the sudden dedication? I remember you only graduated from high school. Are you planning to apply to our university?”
Raiden frowned slightly. “Are you planning to go to university?”
Why hadn’t she asked him for tutoring? Why insist on doing it all herself?
He sighed inwardly. Astrella had always been this way, independent to a fault.
Astrella’s lips curled into a faint smile, but she said nothing.
It was true she had only graduated from high school, but her academic performance had always been stellar. After passing the rigorous aviation recruitment exam, she went straight into the Flight Academy.
Had Raiden forgotten? Or had he simply never cared?
Brushing a stray lock of hair from her face, Astrella slung her backpack over her shoulder and walked ahead.
Behind her, the shadows of Raiden and Norella merged on the pavement, stretching long and indistinct. The two slowed their pace until their shadows overlapped completely. A slender arm slipped through Raiden’s and Norella leaned in, pressing a kiss shyly to his cheek.
Raiden’s breath hitched, his pulse quickening at the touch.
When Astrella reached home, she turned abruptly, only to catch sight of Raiden’s flushed face. His ears and neck had turned a deep shade of red and a flicker of discomfort crossed his features.
Reaghan was sprawled on the couch, munching on a burger and fries, the TV blaring in the background. He barely glanced up as Astrella entered before grabbing a can of iced cola and drinking it down without a care.
Raiden walked past them without a word, calling his son into the bathroom as he did.
Left alone in the living room, Astrella and Norella stood in silence.
Norella slipped off her coat, revealing a new dress beneath, her gaze sharp and mocking.
“This,” she said with a smile, “was bought for me by Raiden. He said I looked great in it. Tell me, has he ever bought you anything like this?”
第9章
Of course not.
The thought echoed silently in Astrella’s mind.
For years, she had always been the one buying clothes for him, every season, eight outfits, four pairs of shoes, each carefully chosen and brand new from the mall. His suits were always pristine, his leather shoes gleaming with an almost unnatural shine.
But her own clothes? They came from the discount racks near the zoo, ten dollars for one, fifteen for two.
Seeing Astrella’s silence, Norella tossed another bag in her direction, a mocking smile on her lips.
“Look,” Norella said, her voice dripping with satisfaction, “even lingerie; Raiden bought this for me. This foreign brand, one set, costs five hundred!”
“And lipstick, perfume, anything I desire, even things I don’t want, he buys it all for me.”
Norella’s eyes gleamed mischievously.
“Oh, how could I forget the best part?” she added, sneaking a box of condoms from her bag. She held it up with a wink as if showing off a prized possession.
“When he paid, he slipped this in secretly. Do you think this brand is any good? I honestly don’t have much experience with it myself.”
Astrella moved her lips slightly, her voice barely a whisper. “If you two want to use them, then use them…”
Since the birth of their child, their once passionate married life had slowly faded into distance. Lately, they had been sleeping in separate rooms.
Now, with his first love back in the picture, maybe Raiden truly had a reason for needing them.
The thought shadowed her expression, a cold weight pressing on her chest. Love was a necessary ingredient in such moments.
Norella’s lips twisted into a mocking smile. “I was going to ask how many he uses in one night, but it seems you wouldn’t know. You don’t have the experience, do you?”
Astrella’s cold expression only fueled Norella’s disdain.
“Don’t tell me,” Norella added with a cruel edge, “after you had the child, you two haven’t…? You really don’t take care of yourself. Look at you, so much younger than me, yet already sporting neck wrinkles. What man would want to touch you?”
As Astrella spoke, Raiden rushed out of the room, his face pale, their son cradled in his arms. "Quick, to the hospital!"
Reaghan's small, chubby face was ghostly white, his lips tinged with an alarming shade of purple. "My tummy... it hurts so bad!"
Astrella's heart twisted painfully at the sound of his anguished voice.
She could set aside her own feelings for Raiden, but for the child she had carried and raised, there was no ignoring her bond.
Raiden’s eyes flashed with barely contained frustration as he looked at her. "How are you taking care of him? How did he suddenly get this sick?"
Astrella's eyes burned with unshed tears. In the past few days, Reaghan had pulled away from her, leaving Raiden and Norella to care for him. And now, with their son so sick, they were blaming her?
Choking back her frustration, Astrella forced herself to swallow the rising tide of grievance.
"It looks like acute enteritis. We have navel plasters at home; apply one to the child first…"
But Norella seized the moment, her voice dripping with mockery. "Astrella, darling, you're just a high school graduate. How could you possibly know anything about medicine?"
Astrella ignored her, pushing aside the sting of her words. She swiftly retrieved the medicine box, taking Reaghan from Raiden’s arms with practiced care. Gently, she applied the navel plaster, wrapping him snugly in her coat before rushing out to the clinic.
The clinic was still open, the lights casting a warm glow. After a thorough examination, the doctor offered a reassuring smile.
"Acute enteritis. Luckily, you applied the navel plaster in time and kept him warm. Otherwise, he would have been in much more pain."
The doctor’s tone softened. "Just be careful. No cola or hamburgers for him anymore. And avoid hot and cold food combinations, they're a nightmare for his stomach."
Astrella nodded silently, her heart squeezing as the doctor continued, "Preschoolers have delicate digestive systems. When you get home, stick to cereal and nutritious meals."
Raiden stood there, his head hanging lower with every word, his expression darkening further.
When Astrella carried her son back home, the sight of the hamburger boxes and cola bottles on the table struck her like a dagger to the heart. The weight of it hit her all at once and a flare of anger ignited within her, scorching through her veins. It was a fire that demanded no response, no words, just pure, unrestrained fury.
Without a second glance, Astrella tightened her grip on her son, the child who had always been her world and turned away. She retreated to her room, seeking solace in the quiet, away from the mess they had left behind.
第10章
With a soft click, Astrella locked the door behind her, the sound echoing in the stillness of the room. In the living room, Raiden sat on the couch, lazily pulling out a cigarette. Norella rushed over to light it for him, a flicker of guilt flashing across her face.
“Raiden…” Norella’s voice quivered as she gazed at him, her face as pale as the moon.
Raiden barely lifted his head, his expression empty, as if the weight of everything had drained him.
Seizing the moment, Norella let a single tear fall, her voice cracking with feigned distress. “Actually, that burger and cola weren’t mine… They were bought by Astrella to frame me. Think about it: how could she know about Reaghan’s illness? How could someone with just a high school education know something even you didn’t?”
Her words dripped with venom, yet she softened them with a tremor of fake vulnerability. “She’s jealous, Raiden. She can’t stand seeing you buy me clothes and gifts. She’s taking it out on the child!”
From the other side of the door, Astrella squeezed her eyes shut, a tide of fury rising within her.
How could she take her anger out on her own child?
Astrella had learned everything she needed to know about handling common childhood illnesses from the parenting books she had devoured, memorizing each remedy and emergency treatment. But Norella? A prestigious university graduate, a PhD from the U.S., how could she lie with such shameless ease?
Yet, Raiden believed her.
He began pounding on the door, his frustration growing. “Astrella, explain yourself! What happened?”
The relentless banging echoed through the house, loud enough to disturb the child who had just fallen asleep. Reaghan stirred in his sleep, his tiny face scrunching in discomfort, before letting out a wail that filled the room with heart-wrenching cries.
Raiden’s voice cracked with desperation. “If you have a problem, take it out on me! Don’t take it out on the child!”
With a swift, forceful kick, the door splintered open and the chaos spilled into the room.
Reaghan’s pitiful cry echoed through the space.
“Don’t cry, Reaghan, Daddy’s here,” Raiden soothed, his voice thick with concern. He scooped the child into his arms, ready to leave, but Astrella’s voice cut through the tension, strained with fury.
“Wait!” she snapped, her finger pointing directly at Norella. “Dare to repeat yourself: who really bought the burger and cola?”
Reaghan, now blinking sleepily, rubbed his eyes and mumbled, “Mom, why are you arguing with Aunt Norella?”
Astrella’s heart twisted painfully. She fought to keep her voice steady. “Reaghan, tell your dad, who bought the burger and cola?”
The child hesitated, shifting his gaze from Norella to Raiden, before whispering something into Raiden’s ear.
Raiden’s expression turned stormy, his voice laced with accusation. “So, it’s come to this and you still want to deny it? Astrella, even your own son says it was you. Are you still trying to frame Norella?”
His words cut through the air like a knife. “Your jealousy has gone too far. You’ve lost all reason to the point of hurting your own child. I don’t think there’s a place for you in this family anymore!”
Astrella’s chest tightened painfully, each breath feeling like it was being ripped from her. She couldn’t believe it; her own son was lying to her.
Tears welled in her eyes, blurring her vision. But she fought to keep her composure. “Reaghan,” she whispered, her voice trembling, “why would you lie?”
Her heart shattered as she waited for the answer, her mind racing.
Reaghan instinctively clung tighter to Raiden and Norella, his small body trembling in fear as his voice wavered. “Mom, you’ve always taught me not to lie. Please don’t push me like this…”
Raiden’s eyes grew cold, his expression hardening. He handed Reaghan to Norella, his breath steadying as he drew a deep one before slapping Astrella across the face.
“Enough! You’ve completely disappointed me. Your jealousy has clouded your every thought. Is this all you care about?”
“We’ve given you everything: food, clothes, a roof over your head and yet, you’ve become more ungrateful by the day!”
“Leave! Leave right now! I never want to see you again in this lifetime!”
Astrella pressed her trembling hand against her cheek. The sting from the slap burned fiercely and had she not steadied herself against the table; she would have crumpled to the floor.
Her vision blurred as tears welled up, unchecked and relentless. The figures in front of her became nothing more than hazy shadows. All that remained was the icy, suffocating emptiness of the house as if she had plunged into a freezing abyss.
“Fine. Don’t worry, I’ll leave.”
The words hung in the air, heavy with finality. She would leave. Soon. It was inevitable. The moment had arrived, whether she was ready or not.