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How Could You Let My Tears Flow to the Sea
NovelShort
Completed
The fifth year Job Henson made captain. Without telling him, I quietly booked a spot on The Voyager, the luxury international cruise ship he commanded, wanting to surprise him. After the welcome dinner ended, just as I was about to jump onto his back the way I used to, someone beat me to it. "Happy fifth anniversary, Job." "I thought you'd forgotten our promise to bring Hettie aboard. She's been going on about it for five years and you still won't bring her. Aren't you afraid she'll make a scene with you?"
Chapters (4)
第1章
Job Henson had been a captain for five years now.
Without telling him, I quietly booked a room on The Voyager, the luxury international cruise ship he commanded, planning to surprise him.
The welcome dinner had just ended. I was about to jump onto his back the way I always used to, when someone beat me to it.
"Job, happy fifth anniversary."
"I honestly thought you'd forgotten our promise and would bring Hettie on board. She's been begging for five years, and you never once let her come. Aren't you worried she'll throw a fit at you?"
Job stood with his hands in his pockets, his whole face soft with affection.
"She won't."
"I told you. Off the ship, I belong to her. On the ship, I belong only to you. That will always hold true."
But he had also promised that Job Henson would never, in this life, betray Hester Pruitt.
My eyes burned red, and I rushed forward to demand an answer.
Job shifted aside in a flash, and only then did I see the woman's face clearly.
My feet felt nailed to the floor, cold seeping up from the soles.
1
I stood there, staring blankly at the two of them.
A group of crew members in uniform passed by, teasing.
"Micky, five years on, and you and the captain still can't stop with the sugar. We're all sick of it."
"Right, Micky, teach us your secret. How do you keep the captain so hooked on you? Let us learn something too."
Michelle Swanson's face went bright red under their back-and-forth, and she looked to Job for help.
Catching her glance, Job let out a soft laugh and pulled her into his arms. "All right, my Micky's shy. Stop picking on her."
Whatever the others said after that, I didn't catch it.
My eyes were locked on Job's hand resting at Michelle's waist, tears blurring my vision.
Five years ago, Michelle had been let go by her company, and I was the one who took her in when things were at their worst.
She'd grown up by the ocean and was a strong swimmer, so I asked Job to find her a job on the ship.
Two years ago she was promoted to floor supervisor, and she even treated Job and me to dinner. Until the moment she appeared just now, I had never once suspected that my closest friend would betray me with my boyfriend.
No wonder Job never let me come aboard, always saying the conditions on the ship were poor, that he didn't want me to suffer.
The truth was, he was afraid I'd find out about him and Michelle.
And all that talk about how the time off the ship belonged to me, and on the ship he belonged only to Michelle.
But he spent more than half the year at sea, and the time he gave me wasn't even a third of what he gave her.
The fireworks show began. The passengers were all up on deck watching, while I stood on the balcony, the howling sea wind driving a bone-deep cold straight into my face.
In no time at all, I was frozen numb.
By the time I went back inside, the fireworks outside had ended too.
The moment I opened my phone, I saw a new post from Michelle.
【The most beautiful fireworks and the person I love most.】
The photo was of her and Job kissing under the fireworks.
Job's face was hidden, but after eight years together, how could I not recognize who it was.
My fingertip hovered over the screen for a second, then tapped save.
When I refreshed again, the post was already gone.
That was exactly when Job's message came through.
【The fireworks tonight were beautiful.】
Below the photo there was a location tag.
Less than a hundred meters from me.
For five years, Job had reported his schedule to me every single day without fail, and everyone envied me for having such an obedient, clingy boyfriend.
I used to think so too.
Only now did I understand that behind every one of those check-ins stood another woman.
I put my phone away with a bitter laugh.
The next second, I changed my mind.
I typed out a message to test him. 【It really is. Next time I'll come watch it with you.】
The message had barely gone through when Job's call came in.
第2章
There was a thread of panic in his voice he couldn't quite hide.
"Hettie, what made you suddenly want to come out here?"
"You get seasick, and the food and lodging on the ship are terrible. If you came, I'd have to take care of you on top of everything."
"Be good. If you like fireworks, how about on our wedding day I put on a show just for you, all your own?"
But we aren't going to get married now.
And I don't get seasick.
The year we graduated, he took me out on the water. The speedboat driver, showing off, started rocking the boat back and forth, and I threw up all over Job.
After that he stubbornly decided I got seasick and never brought me to the coast again.
I gave a soft "Mm."
After I hung up, the tears I'd held back all night fell without my say-so.
I scrolled back through our old chats. The cabin photos Job had sent me were all fake.
The Voyager had sixteen decks, with bars and entertainment for everyone aboard, a whole city moving across the water, nothing like the grim, bare-bones ship he'd described.
I looked it up on the cruise line's website too. As captain of The Voyager, he not only had his own large suite, his meals matched the passengers' standard.
He'd been lying to me for five years.
The sky was just turning gray, most passengers still deep in sleep, only a handful of people on deck. I walked from the first floor up to the sixteenth.
The sun came up, and the horizon turned orange-red.
Job knew I loved watching the sunrise. He often set up his camera to capture the most beautiful ones and send them to me, five hundred and seventy-six of them in all, every one saved in my album.
I don't know how long I watched. The sun was already high over the bow when I turned around and came face to face with two familiar people.
"Hettie?"
"Oh my, it really is you. I just told my husband it was you and he didn't believe me. What a small world!"
I stared blankly at the two of them, an absurd guess rising in my chest.
"It's you two. What are you doing here?"
Michelle's mother's eyes crinkled into slits when she smiled. "It's all thanks to Micky's boyfriend. He's the captain of this ship. He says family can ride the cruise for free twice a year. Otherwise how could we ever bring ourselves to spend that kind of money?"
Huh.
Of course.
After my parents retired, their biggest wish was to go out and see the ocean.
I remembered Job's company had a perk for family members, so I brought it up with him, thinking he could look after them while they were aboard.
What did he say at the time?
Job had looked so troubled. "Hettie, the company already spends a lot every year just to keep running. I don't want to take up company resources for personal things. Besides, there are too many eyes on a ship like that, it's not much fun anyway."
I said nothing. I turned around and booked my parents a luxury cruise myself.
But when it came to Michelle, all those principles and limits of his went straight out the window.
Michelle's mother was still chattering on.
"That Job is such a thoughtful boy. Wouldn't let us spend a cent, even arranged a guide for us, worried we wouldn't enjoy ourselves."
"If it weren't for him, how would her father and I ever have such luck, coming out to enjoy a trip or two like this every year?"
"Oh, that's right, Hettie, you and Micky are friends, so you must have met Job? Micky says plenty of girls are after him, and he only ever had eyes for our Micky."
Her voice was full of pride she couldn't hide.
I was about to say I didn't know him when she grabbed my wrist.
She seemed to spot something, and before I could react she was pulling me toward Job and Michelle a little ways off.
"Micky, Micky——"
They were surrounded by passengers taking photos. At the sound they both looked up.
Their faces changed in an instant.
第3章
"Hettie, why are you here?"
The color drained from Job's face, and he let go of Michelle's hand without thinking.
Once the shock passed, Michelle looked at me with mock reproach. "Hettie, how could you come without telling me? Do you even still think of me as a friend?"
If I'd told her, how would I ever have found out what the two of them had been up to behind my back these five years.
I stared at them coldly. "Am I not allowed to come? Or is it that you're afraid I'll find something out?"
Michelle let out an exaggerated laugh. "How could that be? We'd be thrilled to have you here."
"Oh, right, let me take my parents to the dining room to eat first. You two talk for a bit."
Afraid they'd say the wrong thing, Michelle grabbed one parent in each hand and marched them out of there.
Only then did Job breathe easier.
He pulled me off to an empty corner, his tone put-upon. "Hettie, how could you just show up without a word? And last night when I texted you, why didn't you tell me?"
I looked him dead in the eye, cold. "I spent my own money to come have a good time. Is there a problem with that?"
Catching that something was off in my mood, Job froze for a second, then pulled me into his arms the way he always used to.
"Hettie, that's not what I meant. It's just that you came without a word and I hadn't prepared anything. I only worried that once work got busy I wouldn't be able to look after you."
The moment he held me, the thick smell of perfume on him made me choke.
I remembered that this was the scent Michelle always wore.
I pushed him away in disgust.
"Job, I'm an adult. I can take care of myself."
"And how is it I didn't know when you got so close with Michelle and her parents?"
Job's expression stiffened.
He said it as if it were the most natural thing. "She's your best friend. Of course I'd look after them properly for you. I only did it for your sake. Don't go getting jealous over nothing."
Michelle, having settled her parents, came running back, and hearing this, she offered an apologetic explanation. "Hettie, don't take what my parents said just now to heart."
"You know how old folks are. They want to travel but they hate spending money, so I lied and told them Job was my boyfriend, that he could bring them on the cruise for free."
I wasn't looking at her. All my attention was on the rings on her ring finger and on Job's.
Six months into our relationship, Job proposed to me.
But every time before he boarded the ship, he'd put his ring away.
When I asked him about it, confused, he'd said it with such gravity. "There are so many people on the ship. What if I lost it?"
Back then I even laughed at him for being silly. Only now do I understand that I was the one who was a fool through and through.
My best friend and my boyfriend had been together behind my back for five years, and I was the last one to know.
Sensing my gaze, Michelle hurriedly pulled off her ring and stuffed it into her pocket.
"Hettie, don't get the wrong idea. This is a perk the company handed out to its top employees last year. Lots of my coworkers have one."
Job was quick to change the subject too.
"All right."
"Since you're here, tonight I'll take you somewhere good to eat. Right now I have to get to work. Be a good girl and wait for me in your room."
第4章
I didn't do what Job said and wait for him in the cabin.
Instead I found a quiet corner and let the sea wind hit my face.
It was the first time I'd ever sailed on Job's ship. It would also be the last.
Somewhere along the way I made a call to the agent.
Once this voyage ended, Job and I were supposed to get married.
We'd bought the marital home a year ago.
Job was busy, so the renovations, the furniture, the title transfer, all of it had fallen to me. Selling it now would at least save me a lot of trouble.
Michelle came to dinner that night too.
Job had deliberately picked a restaurant the crew rarely used.
But we still ran into a few of the foreign crew members, and I heard Job introduce me to them as his friend.
He assumed my English was poor. But even a three-year-old can hear the difference between "friend" and "girlfriend."
When I said nothing, Michelle leaned in. “Hettie, how many days are you here to enjoy this time?”
I gave the two of them a mocking look. “How many days do you two want me to stay?”
Michelle propped her face in her hands and put on an excited air. “The longer the better, of course. Hettie, we haven't seen each other in months. You have no idea, being stuck on this ship day after day, nothing but the ocean and the passengers. I'm bored out of my mind.”
“Is that so?”
I looked at them with meaning and didn't call it out.
Job didn't speak either. He peeled a shrimp and, without thinking, set it on Michelle's plate.
All three of us froze.
Michelle recovered first and turned to me, playing at being flattered. “Hettie, you have no idea, Job's usually so strict with us. Today, thanks to you, I actually got a shrimp he peeled himself.”
Job caught himself too and awkwardly peeled a new one for me.
The food had no taste at all.
After dinner, Job walked me back to my cabin.
We'd barely reached the door when he suddenly spoke. “Hettie, I've already handled the checkout. You should get off the ship tomorrow.”
I turned back, stunned. “I never said I was leaving.”
I'd booked a two-week cruise. This was only the second day.
Job's face went cold, his tone leaving no room for argument. “Hettie, this isn't a place for you.”
I let out a scoff.
“Then who is it a place for?”
“Michelle? Or her parents?”
The question made Job force down his temper. “Hettie, don't let your mind run wild. We're getting married soon. I'm swamped with work, and the wedding still needs you to arrange it. You shouldn't be wasting time here.”
“Besides, with you here, I get distracted.”
I just looked at him.
“Job, are we really going to get married?”
Job answered without a second's thought. “Of course. You're the only woman I'll ever want to marry.”
I almost blurted out, “Then what about Michelle,” but I swallowed the words back down.
Job had already pushed my checkout through, so however unwilling I was, I got off the ship the next day.
Through the porthole, he and I looked at each other across the distance.
A moment later my phone buzzed twice.
【Hettie, wait for me.】
【The minute we're back, we'll go get the license.】
I glanced down at them and only found it laughable.
He'd driven me off the ship for Michelle, and still had the nerve to imagine I'd stand there like a fool and wait for him.
Off the ship, I dragged my luggage to the airport without looking back.
Before takeoff, I sent him one last message.
【Job, let's break up.】